Unlikely pain relief and RIP Chester

I’ve had some mood swings, and pain relief from the oddest sources.

My mood improved after I started house-sitting some plants (‘forced schedule’) and my pain has decreased from removing gluten from my diet. I’m about a month into my upped dosage of all my meds so that could be part of the decrease in pain and increase in mood, but it’s also way too convenient of timing haha.

Experimenting with the blood type diet, I’ve eased off for this past week and a half, looking forward to getting back into it next week to see how much better it makes me feel. It was too much with all the changes going on, and I started binging on chocolate and other unhealthy (re – cheese!) foods, so by easing off it I ended up easing off on the need to binge. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again!

Counselling has been going well, she was super excited to hear that my mood has improved and gotten better.  I’ve started ‘revisiting’ old thoughts/memories to try and get through some of those traumatic events and be able to talk about them, with the tools I have now. It’s been beneficial getting fresh perspective on these situations. I’ve only had one bad day since my counselling session, and it was the day we received news that Linkin Parks singer committed suicide.  Linkin Park was an amazing band, and a lot of their songs helped me through some tough times. I just wish he had been able to find help for his own demons that didn’t culminate in him becoming yesterdays news. 

Suicide may feel like an answer, but it is a very permanent one, and I implore everyone to get help if you are feeling suicidal. I did. Back in 2007-2008, I was so sucidal that I had a plan to drive my work van into the next Semi truck I came across while on the road by myself.  

I made sure I was never by myself in that van, and got help soon after. 

I’m still here. Still fighting those same demons, but I am happy I am still here. If I had followed through back then, I would not have had the amazing experiences I’ve had now. 

RIP Chester.

When my time comes/Forget the wrong that I’ve done/Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed/And don’t resent me/And when you’re feeling empty/Keep me in your memory/Leave out all the rest/Leave out all the rest

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